Who Are You?

Are you orange juice?

Are you a doughnut?

Are you a hard-boiled egg?

I know these are interesting questions but it is what has been on my heart after a conversation with my husband the other day. Do you know that you fit into one of these three categories? Some people have other names for them such as a tough girl, party girl, and the people pleaser. These are my titles.

Are you the orange juice girl? The orange juice girl is one who is pleasing. Pleasing everyone that’s around her. She flows like juice does into every nook and cranny where her kindness is “perceived” to be needed. She is the one who will go the second and third mile to make sure she is accepted by those around her. Deep underneath all the kindness is this huge fear that if she says “no” or does not respond perfectly in a given situation, she will be rejected. If her pleasant taste isn’t experienced just maybe she will be poured away.

Maybe you are the doughnut girl? This girl is like a huge cream filled doughnut stuffed with sweet filling and then rolled in white doughnut powder. The doughnut girl is fun and fluff. She is the one you can hang out with on any given day. She is the one who will be available to party at 11:00 a.m. or 11:00 p.m. She knows how to make a joke out of pretty much anything. When you are with her, you can be sure laughter will be around as much as the powder on your doughnut shows on your face. The laughter and party conceals a heart that is afraid of being real, of vulnerability. The doughnut girl is used to coping with pain through laughter.

If you don’t see yourself in the top two examples, maybe you are the hard-boiled egg. The hard-boiled egg girl is the one who can be counted on. She is the one who can walk into a tough situation and not appear to be bothered. She knows what she thinks. She knows why she thinks what she does. She also knows her action plans to pull things off. She can be a faithful supporter. The hard-boiled egg girl is tough just like the shell of a hard-boiled egg she needs cracked open to see what’s inside. This hard-boiled egg girl has learned that life isn’t safe. She has been deeply wounded and betrayed and finds it very difficult to allow people to see the golden “yoke” that is her heart. If you get beyond the tough exterior, you will find a gold mine of resources.

Which girl are you? The orange juice girl, the doughnut girl, and the hard-boiled egg girl all have something important, something good. This something good is valuable until it becomes a coping mechanism to protect yourself from relationships that are deep and meaningful.

For myself, I find that often I try to be to people what I think they want. If you want an orange juice girl, I’ll try to be nice. If you want the doughnut girl, I’ll party for an evening or two or three. But normally I find that most often I am the hard-boiled egg  girl. I am the one who many times appears as the “rock”.  I came to realize  that I was coping with life through being tough. In some rocky situations, I’d shut my heart down; giving everyone around me the tough outer shell of a hard-boiled egg. There has been too much pain by being honest and open with people only to have them betray you. The risk of loving was too great and so I found myself shutting down. Do you do this type of thing in your styles of relating? Or am I the only one?  The Holy Spirit is gently working with me. Do I want to live my life being tough? Yes, God has given me a strong personality but He wants a soft golden heart along with the toughness. What does God want from you?

Today I bless each of you; my readers as you figure out what type of girl you are and what God wants from you! May He be glorified!

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